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Thursday, February 25, 2010

Day 182: February 25th, 2010

Quote of the Day: "Sometimes I wish I were a little kid again, skinned knees are easier to fix than broken hearts."  ~Author Unknown

I just had the priviledge of spending the entire day with some of the tiniest little babies I have ever seen.  Surely not as tiny as SOME people get to see, but they were definitely small compared to any I have ever dealt with.  Today was my clinical day to spend in the nursery at the hospital, and it was a pretty unique experience, which I probably won't forget any time soon.

I don't know what I expected, really, maybe lots of really loud screaming and crying, as I'm used to babies doing.  But these precious little angels did very little of that.   It was really dark in there when I walked in, but it was SO quiet.  All those tiny little angels sleeping peacefully.  I was surrounded all day by tiny little feet no bigger than half my pinkie, itty bitty little fingers.  And oh! Those cute little puckered mouths - my absolute favorite part of babies.  There is nothing in the world cuter than a baby-pucker!  We had six little ones to help care for, and not a single minute of the day was boring. On the contrary, watching a little baby sleep can be the most relaxing fun you could ever dream of having.  I was caring for this little baby who was a little over three pounds at birth, and I just could not get over how small and fragile they look. Notice I said look, though... they really are tough little things. You want to know what a fighter looks like? Go visit a nursery sometime. It's a pretty humbling experience.

Once I got accustomed to the nursery and was able to feel like I had "found the groove" so to speak, it was like being transported back in time and holding Damien and Cody for the first time. I think maybe God designed us so that holding an infant would release chemicals into our bloodstream that would foster an insntantaneous urge to protect.  And there's nothing better than seeing a freshly-born baby come into the nursery with Dad right there, gloating happily and taking pictures. I can't remember if Ron got to go visit the nursery or not, but it's like a sacred place.  You just can't help but feel awed by it.

There is a dark side, however, in working with babies.  Sometimes you have to deal with the dark side of society. The side that slides down into drugs and alcohol.  The side where a mother can't control herself or her addictions, and a tiny little life is affected, sometimes permanently, by her poor decisions.  Those are the instances which break your heart, the ones that make you wish that you made just enough money, had a bigger house, could take those babies in and make sure that they get a better life than the one which they will probably be made to suffer through to adulthood. If they even make it that long, that is. Sometimes the babies are lucky and will be placed into loving foster families who can watch over them. But the opposite can happen as well, where the foster family becomes more abusive than what they would have endured at the hands of drug and alcohol addicted parents.  Either way you look at, the only ones who are really suffering are those tiny little creations born with birth defects or drug addicted.  The ones who have to fight just to survive from the moment of their birth, then once they are released from the hospital have to keep fighting just to KEEP surviving against the odds. No wonder there are so many sad stories in the world.

The good news is, I went the whole day without once thinking that I wanted another baby! Yay me! HAHAHA

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